I haven’t been to my old church for probably a year now.

A good friend of mine asked if I would come on Saturday for fellowship night. I went. I went despite being quite tired from a day of work and a pile of papers to grade.

I think it was a good gesture from the new head pastor to have a fellowship night with the activities. He was trying to help people reflect by making line graph about their fellowships for the following rating:

  1. Welcoming-how does the fellowship welcome new people
  2. Worship-including personal spiritual growth
  3. Word-learning about the Bible
  4. Work-evangelizing and outreach
  5. Number of people

According to the graph we peaked at around 2006-2008 and then went down from there. It was in 2009 that we started splitting as Ming and Shilee tookover as mentor and started a new order. Sounds funny but that was what happened. Without consulting the pastor at the time, there was a major restructuring. All small group leaders were let go. There was no longer small group leaders and no more small group leader meetings where we used to discuss things like programme and shared about each groups.

The new structure was the mentors and senior group members at the top excluding the pastor to decide on almost everything. It was a new executive head or something. Below it was a new middle management group with people my age but most of them not the small group leaders of yesteryears to implement what the mentor group decided.

Min started some really bad theology and was basically using the Scripture to have people follow him. At the same time, him and his cronies were ousting the head pastor, who was the pastor overseeing our fellowship.

I would say that was the time when the leadership was rebelling and walking away from the Word of God.

We were divided because Min and Shirli, and her cronies were starting to show favouritism toward selected people who they could control and lead. They only invited certain people for eating dim sum together after Sunday service. They only invited certain people to their homes for dinner while telling others that we shouldn’t just think about having fun and eating out during fellowship.

Min and Shirli had their cronies and their favored people be in most of the positions in fellowship and lead worship, prayers and be chairman of worship.

They were just full of themselves and became echo of Min and Shirli. A lot of relationships were destroyed. We were divided. Many followers of Shirli stopped interacting with others.

I wanted to talk more but people were just noisy. Ki took charge of drawing, I think she likes the attention. I think of some girls at church who like to takeover and yea, guys just let them be. Guys don’t want to be aggressive because you don’t really want to see guys being aggressive.

When it was time for us to present.  Joe and Shirli went up and Shirli was right in saying there’s something we need to reflect and she felt something when looking back. She was more honest.

Going there I wasn’t really welcomed by my fellowship members except for Sal, my good friend and that was it. None of the so called “leader” and deacons said anything to me.

At the end, I was very surprised that Lem from another fellowship came all the way from the middle to where I was. He said my name and held out his hand for a handshake.


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